Does anyone else go to put down the toilet seat and hear it literally crack with the dry pee glue that has crystallized since the time your 4 year old son has used the can, and, unable to control the direction of that initial blast has basted the entire back of the toilet with it?
Just wondering.
It is night time and Mr. Z pipes up: I have to go poop. He takes his time. Since I am farting around on the internets, I suddenly realize that over 10 min has passed and he is still "pooping"
"Zac..what is going on in there?"
"Oh, nothing, I'm done." And he scoots back to bed.
I go investigate.
There is toothpaste everywhere. all over the counter, the mirror, the floor and the sink. there is a soaking, dripping towel on the counter and the drawer is full of water. Full.
"Zac, what is all this?"
"I had to was off my Bakugon Robot. He was all toothpasty."
"Why was he like that?'
"Because I was experimenting."
"And the towel, and the mirror and the floor?"
"Experimenting."
"And the drawer full of water?"
"Oh! That is my robot's swimming pool."
"You need to come in here and clean it up."
"Ok. But can you help me? It is very messy. That is because I ran away."
Mr.Z comes up to me an asks to get his nails painted. "I want blue nail paint!"
"We have no blue, I remember you dumped out the blue on the bathroom floor one day."
"Oh yeah, that is why we don't have it. Because YOU took it away."
"Why did I take it away?"
"Because I dumped it out on the floor....But you STILL took it away."
"Yup."
....
"So, can I have my nails painted? It was a long time that I dumped it out..."
"Ok."
"Yay! I want blue!"
"We have no blue, remember?"
"Golden! I want golden nail paint!"
"We also have sparkly..."
"UGH! MUM! Sparkly is for girls! I don't LIKE girl things! Golden nay-als! Da deh da deh! Super fingers!"
...................................................................................................................................................................
Theology with a 6 year old:
"Mum, I was talking with my friend today and she said you need to get bath-tized so that you don't go to bad heaven.
So it is a good thing that I take a lot of baths, I sure don't want to go to bad heaven."
"Mum, I need to stop and pray for a minute."
"Ok, who are you praying to?"
"God, Mum."
"Who do you think God is?"
"I think God is the Universe, maybe. I just want to say hi."
She whispers something to the sky.
"Ok! I'm done! Do you think God likes jokes?"
"Who doesn't like jokes?"
"Good."
"Do I get to hear the joke?"
"NO! It's for GOD!"
....................................................................................................................................................
Miss. E does a lot of singing. She sings more than she talks, which sounds cute, but is actually mind-crackingly intolerable. We will be at the dinner table and ask about her day or something and she might begin to speak the answer, then she catches herself,
"Oh, wait a minute...1, 2, 3, 4, clap clap clap clap, ooooooooooooooooh! Well, you see Mum! Oh ya! Well you see Dad! Oh ya! Well, you want to know how my day goes! clap clap clap, Well it goes like this: tsss, tsss t tsss..." Then she will be dissatisfied with her song and have to start over. And if our attention falters during her performance she will become very annoyed. Also, we are not allowed to join in, and no one else gets to sing. All in all it is highly unfair.
Just wondering.
It is night time and Mr. Z pipes up: I have to go poop. He takes his time. Since I am farting around on the internets, I suddenly realize that over 10 min has passed and he is still "pooping"
"Zac..what is going on in there?"
"Oh, nothing, I'm done." And he scoots back to bed.
I go investigate.
There is toothpaste everywhere. all over the counter, the mirror, the floor and the sink. there is a soaking, dripping towel on the counter and the drawer is full of water. Full.
"Zac, what is all this?"
"I had to was off my Bakugon Robot. He was all toothpasty."
"Why was he like that?'
"Because I was experimenting."
"And the towel, and the mirror and the floor?"
"Experimenting."
"And the drawer full of water?"
"Oh! That is my robot's swimming pool."
"You need to come in here and clean it up."
"Ok. But can you help me? It is very messy. That is because I ran away."
Mr.Z comes up to me an asks to get his nails painted. "I want blue nail paint!"
"We have no blue, I remember you dumped out the blue on the bathroom floor one day."
"Oh yeah, that is why we don't have it. Because YOU took it away."
"Why did I take it away?"
"Because I dumped it out on the floor....But you STILL took it away."
"Yup."
....
"So, can I have my nails painted? It was a long time that I dumped it out..."
"Ok."
"Yay! I want blue!"
"We have no blue, remember?"
"Golden! I want golden nail paint!"
"We also have sparkly..."
"UGH! MUM! Sparkly is for girls! I don't LIKE girl things! Golden nay-als! Da deh da deh! Super fingers!"
...................................................................................................................................................................
Theology with a 6 year old:
"Mum, I was talking with my friend today and she said you need to get bath-tized so that you don't go to bad heaven.
So it is a good thing that I take a lot of baths, I sure don't want to go to bad heaven."
"Mum, I need to stop and pray for a minute."
"Ok, who are you praying to?"
"God, Mum."
"Who do you think God is?"
"I think God is the Universe, maybe. I just want to say hi."
She whispers something to the sky.
"Ok! I'm done! Do you think God likes jokes?"
"Who doesn't like jokes?"
"Good."
"Do I get to hear the joke?"
"NO! It's for GOD!"
....................................................................................................................................................
Miss. E does a lot of singing. She sings more than she talks, which sounds cute, but is actually mind-crackingly intolerable. We will be at the dinner table and ask about her day or something and she might begin to speak the answer, then she catches herself,
"Oh, wait a minute...1, 2, 3, 4, clap clap clap clap, ooooooooooooooooh! Well, you see Mum! Oh ya! Well you see Dad! Oh ya! Well, you want to know how my day goes! clap clap clap, Well it goes like this: tsss, tsss t tsss..." Then she will be dissatisfied with her song and have to start over. And if our attention falters during her performance she will become very annoyed. Also, we are not allowed to join in, and no one else gets to sing. All in all it is highly unfair.
